It still baffles me that sometimes we don’t know what we think or what we really feel until our mouths open. What comes out of us in pressure or hardship is worth paying attention to. The unrehearsed words that we speak are equally as telling.
Recently someone was asking about my life in Spain and asked if I would move around a lot within Spain. My immediate response was “No, I’m not really doing this for adventure.” I’d never spoken that sentence before, never thought through that idea, but there it was and it is true.
In many ways living in Spain is exciting, but what draws me there is not wanderlust or a thirst for adventure. I am grateful I have this opportunity in this season, feel it is where I’m meant to be right now, and I enjoy my life there. But “moving all around Spain” is not my goal. I desire depth with people always, wherever I am and wherever I end up, and wanderlust and adventure-living don’t really pave the way for depth of relationship.
Dale Partridge says that “the desire to be gone as a way of living, is often no more than a dangerous addiction to “new”. To the beginning. To the start. In other words, the easy part. You see, real relational fruit requires the presence of the farmer. It requires more than planting seeds. It requires frequent watering, fertilizing, and pruning. People who live in a lifestyle of leaving, can’t build deep roots with many. They can’t disciple or mentor or walk in deep waters with others. Presence and availability are the currency of a vibrant life. Go on vacation. Explore the world. But don’t be gone when your crop needs watering.”
No matter where I am, may commitment, steadfastness, depth with people, and listening to the call of Jesus characterize my days.