What does it look like to assume the best of someone?
A couple of years ago I ended up at a conference on marriage. 🤷🏻♀️ I didn’t mind because you can always learn something. And there was one thing that was said that has stood out to me ever since: Assume the best of them.
Assume the best of people who love you whenever there is a misunderstanding, a miscommunication, hurt feelings, or hurtful words.
This is hard. But it can spare so much bitterness and resentment.
Assuming the best means not automatically assuming that someone does things the way I do them.
It means verbally asking questions instead of making silent judgments.
It means thinking of every possible viewpoint.
It means trusting that the other person had kind intentions.
It means believing that they tried their best and didn’t mean to hurt me.
It means saying to myself, “What that person did was hurtful to me. But I know that they love me, so I will assume that they had good intentions. I will communicate with them about this rather than make assumptions and judge their intentions.”
(If you wanted a little glimpse of how my brain works, there it was.)
What else? How are we different when we assume the best of someone? How are our relationships different?